My 16 year old first love. You know they say you never forget your first love… well mine was all for the wrong reasons.
Reasons I would never tell ANYONE except my diary…
I used to tell it everything. How he would take photos of me in my underwear and put them online, how he would accuse me of cheating if another boy so much as looked my way. How he asked me to call him on a pay phone twice a day if I went away anywhere and if I didn’t he would get angry.
…You know the type.
Well all the accusations, the weirdness and the rage, my diary knew it all.
It also knew EXACTLY what I thought about it too. All of which my adolescent naivety was much too scared to share aloud.
So you could imagine what happened when he found it..
Whilst showering I’d accidentally left it in a place quite obvious to curious minds. I came out of the shower and that was it, he was GONE.
There in his place was an open diary.
In hindsight this was possibly by far one of THE BEST methods of breaking up with someone not good for me that the universe has ever blessed we with.
No argument, no hurtful words, no goodbyes, but Silence. Peace. Justice.
I have written diaries ever since I was 12 years old. They have helped me to cope, helped me to heal, helped me to accept and to appreciate. And as demonstrated in this story, helped me to escape.
Having quite possibly just lived through the most liberating, wild and yet troubled time of my life on finding myself on the other side of my marriage I have collected a few one liners from the pages of woe I wrote along the way..
Stay tuned for some uplifting, positive, fun and at times humorously sarcastic written messages in mind from the series I like to call ‘Thx inner Anna’ 💕💕